why the fuck did shayna have to go, its just not fair, why couldnt someone gay go .. she was my best friend .. and her mom the fucking dick face didnt even tell her till like thursday so she had 1 day with us .. one freaking day .. the party was fun until lauren broke out the prayers ... then i went into hysterical .. and then theresa did .. then brittany .. then jonathan .. then johnny .. then kelly .. then lauren .. mark stood strong .. it was so horrible i remember it all so perfectly ... "oh my god this is a nightmare" - shayna .. kept ringing in my ears .. looking at her stupid fucking mom holding the door open .. saying "hope to see you at shaynas birthday party" when we all know shes not gunna have one for her .. its just i hate her SO much .. shayna was like one of the best people in dover rec, she was the nicest girl, i love her soo much, and UGH I FUCKING HATE HER MOM!!!!!!! i wish shayna was next to me now .. i cant stop thinking about it .. she sang her solo the last day so well .. i was soo proud of her .. but it was just depressing listening .. cuz that would be the LAST time .. and then brittany went up and started singing .. then i started crying during pop stars .. then i got myself under control .. and then at the end of grease "we`ll always, be together, always, be together, always, be together..." i just started sobbing right there god ... wtf is wrong with that woman .. then she tells my mom that she told shayna in winter, fucking lies, she told theresa and her mom at the grocery store in may she couldnt wait for shayna to be in dover rec, then why would she sign her up if she knew she was gunna take her out, and it just so happens shes going on a cruiz ... I HATE HER ....


and my mom is being obnoxious .. she wouldnt let me sleep over amandas .. ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ... but at least my mom isnt that bad .. w/e ..

back to shayna .. we cried for 2 1/2 hours striaght




w/e i`ll write later bye